Tick Tock Turkey and the Endless Pudding

Description Tick Tock Turkey and the Endless Pudding

Download the audio of The Endless Pudding (right click, save as)

By Michael Brett The latest update from Egg Island, home to that greedy, time-traveling bird, Tick Tock Turkey, features Blobert, who on the face of it, is quite ordinary as blobs go. Like many blobs he is quite hard to see because he is often just to the left of himself. This particular blob happens to be a fabulous cook. His latest creation is a Very Filling Pudding, but it's not quite filling enough to satisfy a gobbling Turkey.

Read by Natasha Gostwick Duration 22 minutes

This story is named after a very special recipe created by an ingenious chef called Blobert. It's a story from Egg Island, the home of that famous time travelling bird, Tick Tock Turkey. And it's called The Endless Pudding.

It was a hot afternoon on Egg Island. Future Dog had decided that it was time that Tick Tock Turkey should try to get on better with another of the island’s inhabitants – Blobert. Tick Tock Turkey didn’t know Blobert very well, but he had made it clear that he had a very disapproving view of blobs. Future Dog had brought Blobert down to the beach so that his two best friends could have a chance to get to know each other.

If you want to know what Blobert looks like, imagine a blob: that’s Blobert. Blobs are not easy to see, and Tick Tock Turkey’s main problem with Blobert was all the effort it took to look at him. Before they could be better friends, Tick Tock Turkey would have to learn to look at blobs without going cross-eyed. Blobert, who is a rather talented cook, had prepared a surprise for Tick Tock Turkey, but he wasn’t allowed to have it until he had tried to be friendly. Tick Tock Turkey had been trying to look at Blobert for nearly an hour, without much success.

‘Blobert,’ said Tick Tock Turkey, throwing his wings up in frustration, ‘why do you have to be so weird! Stand still! There you are. No, gone again. It’s giving me a headache.’

‘Sorry,’ said Blobert. ‘I know you’re trying. But I’m not weird, really. In fact I’m quite normal. As blobs go, I’m a very ordinary blob.’

‘Where’s he gone now? Blobert? I can hear you, but you’ve disappeared again.’

Future Dog, who had mastered the art of seeing Blobert, nodded sympathetically: ‘There is a knack to it,’ she said. ‘I’ve spent more time with Blobert than you, Tick Tock Turkey, and with practice I’ve managed to get the hang of it. But it wasn’t easy – I had to make a real effort.’

‘Why bother?’ said Tick Tock Turkey. ‘I’m sorry Blobert, but if you were meant to be seen then it wouldn’t be such hard work, would it? You don’t see anyone struggling to see me, now do you? Everyone always knows where I am.’

‘Yes, they really do,’ sighed Future Dog.

‘I’ve tried to see you Blobert, but it makes my eyes go funny. Can I have my surprise now?’

‘Not yet,’ said Future Dog.

‘I get this a lot, being a blob,’ said Blobert. ‘The secret is not to try too hard. Don’t squint – relax your eyes. The thing is, I tend to be just slightly to the left of where I am.’

Tick Tock Turkey scrunched up his face: ‘Slightly to the left of where you are? That’s stupid!’

‘Yes,’ said Blobert, ‘it sounds silly, but that’s the way it is. I’m always slightly to the left of where I am. It can make me seem fuzzy. It’s a nightmare for photographs. People try their best, but they always end up with a picture of a tree or an empty beach. When you look very closely, there’s a blurry part at the edge of the picture. That’s me. I’ve been lopped off the side. It’s very annoying. Actually, I’ve never seen myself, so even I’m not sure what I look like.’

Tick Tock Turkey flapped his wings again: ‘If you want to know what you look like, then do what everybody else does – use a mirror, you silly blob!’

‘Be nice,’ said Future Dog.

‘I’ve tried a mirror,’ said Blobert. ‘But it’s the same with my reflection. I stand in the proper place, right in front of it, but my reflection is always too far to the left for me to see. It’s rather sad, not knowing what you look like. But then I’m a blob, so I probably look more or less like a blob. And everyone knows a blob when they see one. Except me, I suppose.’

‘And me,’ said Tick Tock Turkey, ‘so I can’t help you there. I don’t know where to look. Can I have my surprise now?’

‘One last try, Tick Tock Turkey’ said Blobert. ‘How many fingers am I holding up?’

Tick Tock Turkey concentrated very, very hard. His eyes stared and he clamped his beak shut tight with the effort.

‘Um… I see… I can see…’

‘Oh sorry,’ said Blobert, ‘I’m over here. You’re looking the wrong way.’

‘This is ridiculous!’ gobbled Tick Tock Turkey. ‘You’re having a laugh! Just give me the surprise now!’

He looked harder. ‘Hang on… hang on… Yes! I can see three fingers! Three big, fuzzy, blobby fingers! That’s right, isn’t it Blobert?’

‘I don’t know,’ said Blobert. ‘I can’t see either.’

Tick Tock Turkey squawked. ‘You stupid… I mean, Future Dog – how many fingers is Blobert holding up?’

Future Dog peered over her sunglasses, just to double-check, then smiled. ‘Well done, Tick Tock Turkey!’ she said. ‘It is three!’

‘About time,’ said Tick Tock Turkey. ‘I’m getting too dizzy for this. Now give me the surprise. And it had better be a good one.’

‘It is,’ said Blobert. ‘Come this way.’

Tick Tock Turkey flapped his wings: ‘He’s only gone and vanished again. Which way did he go?’

‘Over here,’ said Future Dog.

Tick Tock Turkey followed them. And there, in a small, shady clearing at the edge of the jungle, sitting on a cool rock, was a large pudding.

Tick Tock Turkey’s beak fell open. ‘Oh yes!’ he said, ‘a pudding! What kind of pudding is it?’

‘This,’ said Blobert, ‘is called a Very Filling Pudding. It’s been cooling here for an hour since I finished cooking it.’

‘A Very Filling Pudding!’ said Tick Tock Turkey, ‘I like the sound of that!’

‘And it tastes even better than it sounds,’ said Blobert. ‘Not only does it taste very good, it also leaves you feeling replete.’

‘What the egg is “replete”?’ asked Tick Tock Turkey. ‘I hope it’s not some kind of tummy ache. I can’t stand tummy aches.’

‘No, said Future Dog, ‘the word “replete” is a polite way of saying that you’ve eaten enough and that you’re nicely full. But you’re not stuffed! It’s rude to say that you’re stuffed if someone gives you food.’

Tick Tock Turkey shook his head. ‘Well I don’t see the sense of that. What’s the point of eating if you don’t want to get stuffed? And even if you are completely stuffed, it’s not a problem, because there’s still always room for pudding. That’s one of the basic rules of eating. There is always room for pudding. Everyone knows that.’

‘Well, try some,’ said Blobert, ‘it is your surprise, after all.’

Blobert cut the pudding into three equal pieces.

Tick Tock Turkey licked his beak, picked up one of the pieces of pudding and shoved it into his mouth. He chewed happily. ‘Interesting,’ he said, through a mouthful of pudding. Then he took a second piece and stuck it in his mouth. ‘Lovely flavour, um, a delicate combination of tastes. A firm texture, nicely done, Chef.’ Then Tick Tock Turkey quickly gobbled the last piece, swallowing it without even chewing.

Future Dog and Blobert looked at the rock, which was now empty apart from a few crumbs.

Tick Tock Turkey quickly ate the crumbs as well, licking his beak happily. ‘Fair do’s, Blobert,’ he said. ‘That is not a bad pudding at all. I’ll give you that. Nice job, Blob! A bit moreish, though, isn’t it?’

Future Dog folded her arms, very disappointed. ‘Tick Tock Turkey,’ she said, ‘you ate the whole thing!’

‘It didn’t mean to sound ungrateful,’ said Tick Tock Turkey. ‘Thank you very much for the pudding, Blobert, it was very tasty. I am replete.’

‘My goodness,’ said Blobert. ‘You had the entire pudding. You should feel completely stuffed.’

‘To be honest,’ said Tick Tock Turkey, patting his grumbling tummy, ‘I don’t feel anywhere near replete. That was just a taster as far as I’m concerned. I need a truckload of that stuff – I’m a growing bird. Come on, Blobert, have you got any more cooked up? I’ve got a right hunger.’

‘I only made one,’ said Blobert, ‘and that was for all three of us. I really think you’ve had enough. A Very Filling Pudding is surprisingly filling. Usually a spoonful is plenty. Are you sure you feel alright?’

‘Forget that rubbish, Blobster,’ said Tick Tock Turkey, ‘a little never goes a long way with me! The usual rules don’t apply to this turkey – I’m still ravenous!’

‘I think Blobert’s right,’ said Future Dog. ‘You should have a rest. I’ve tasted Very Filling Pudding before and it can weigh very heavily on the stomach. Perhaps it just takes longer for you to feel full.’

‘That’s for sure,’ said Tick Tock Turkey. ‘But I’ve got the taste for it now. How long will it take to make another?’

‘Oh, I really don’t think you should have any more,’ said Blobert. ‘Anyway, it would take hours to make, and I’m afraid I’ve arranged to go climbing on Egg Mountain this afternoon, so I’ll be too busy. I might have a spare hour or two tomorrow morning.’

Tick Tock Turkey looked thoughtfully at the time watch strapped to his wing. ‘Hmm,’ he said, ‘I could always…’

‘No you don’t!’ said Future Dog.

‘What?’ said Tick Tock Turkey.

‘I know what you’re thinking,’ said Future Dog. ‘You’re thinking of using the watch to zoom into the future and have some more pudding tomorrow when Blobert’s cooked it!’

‘No I wasn’t,’ said Tick Tock Turkey.

And, in fact, although he could be a very silly bird, Tick Tock Turkey was thinking of something much cleverer than that.

He gobbled excitedly: ‘Yes! I’ve got an utterly brilliant plan. And I promise I won’t eat any other puddings. You’re both right. I know that one pudding is more than enough.’

He held one wing high in the air. ‘It’s time to use the time watch – I’ll see you two later! Well, I probably won’t be able to see you, Blobert, no offense, but you know what I mean.’

‘Don’t you dare eat any more puddings!’ said Future Dog.

With a quick fiddle on the watch button, Tick Tock Turkey whooshed away in a cloud of sparks.

He found himself standing in exactly the same place, beside the rock in the small, shady clearing. And the Very Filling Pudding was there! He had traveled back in time one quarter of an hour.

He could hear some voices not far away, down on the beach. It sounded like a dog was trying to teach a very grumpy turkey how to look at a blob. Tick Tock Turkey realised that it was him – with Future Dog and Blobert. He wanted to laugh out loud, but he kept quiet. Now he could eat the pudding again, by eating it before! And he still wouldn’t have had more than one pudding, because it was the same one.

Without any delay, he gobbled the pudding in one, two, three mouthfuls

‘Lovely,’ he said, quietly, and patted his tummy.

‘I don’t feel quite so hungry now,’ he said to himself, I suppose I should head back – I mean forward – to when I left. But I could manage a bit more. Perhaps I could have just one more mouthful…’

Tick Tock Turkey twiddled the watch, and whoosh! – he was in the same place again, but another quarter of an hour earlier. And the pudding was there again, all in one piece!

He could hear Future Dog down on the beach, explaining to the other Tick Tock Turkey how he should try to see Blobert, and that if he did he could have a surprise. The other Tick Tock Turkey didn’t know what the surprise was going to be – but this Tick Tock Turkey had already had two surprise puddings, and he was about to take a bite out of a third! He tried not to laugh again. He tasted the pudding. It was still warm from the stove, and a bit sticky. But it was absolutely delicious. Tick Tock Turkey couldn’t resist another taste and, before long, and with a bit of effort, he had eaten the whole lot. Again!

‘Same again!’ he said, and without delay, he whooshed back another quarter of an hour – three quarters of an hour in total – and gobbled down yet another Very Filling Pudding. This one didn’t go down so easily and he had to take his time, but finally it was all gone. He sat down and leaned against the rock.

‘Well,’ he said to himself. ‘I’ve got to admit, this Very Filling Pudding is finally starting to feel very filling. My tummy’s definitely full now. I should probably head back. I suppose this is what it feels like to be replete!’

He began to adjust the watch so that he could zoom forward to the future, to when he left Future Dog and Blobert.

‘But it seems such a waste,’ he said. ‘I know that if I go back in time again then there’ll be another delicious pudding. And that one’s going to be fresh out of Blobert’s stove. I’d love to know what it tastes like hot!’

So Tick Tock Turkey adjusted the time watch yet again, and whoosh! The pudding was steaming on the rock, and he could hear Blobert walking away from the clearing and saying hello to Future Dog on the beach. It was a whole hour earlier.

He slowly got to his feet, feeling extremely heavy, and rather tired, and leaned towards the pudding. He opened his beak to take a bite, but found that he felt a little ill.

‘Oh no,’ he said, ‘that’s not like me. Pull yourself together, Tick Tock Turkey – don’t let this lovely hot pudding go to waste!’

But no matter how much he tried, the more he thought about the steaming, hot pudding, then the more he started to feel sick, and full up. In fact, he wasn’t just full up; he was fuller than he had ever felt before.

‘My tummy hurts,’ he said. ‘I feel so heavy, and queasy. I can’t stand up.’

By now, Tick Tock Turkey was finding it very hard even to move, and with one final effort he managed to reach across his swollen tummy and adjust the time watch so that it would take him back to where he started, and away from this horrible, sickly pudding. He pushed the button.

SHOOWH!

‘He’s back,’ said Blobert.

Future Dog and Blobert looked down at Tick Tock Turkey, who was lying on the ground, holding his tummy and moaning.

‘I think,’ said Future Dog, ‘that the Very Filling Pudding has finally made you very full!’

‘“Full” is not the word,’ groaned Tick Tock Turkey. ‘I’m super-stuffed!’

‘It’s more polite to say “replete”,’ said Blobert, who – if you’re lucky enough to be able to see blobs – was smiling. ‘But this time you’re right: this Tick Tock Turkey is super-stuffed indeed!’

And that was the story of the Endless Pudding by Michael Brett.